I have a bit of a tradition on my blog to write a post for my "Mothering Anniversary". And today is that day.
Today is Matthew's 8th birthday. Eight years ago my life was changed. I became a mother. It's been everything like I thought it would be. It's been nothing like I thought it would be. I've been the best mother ever. I've been the worst. I've poured out my heart and soul to the entire world and prayed for kindness.
I am not the kind of mother that people look at and say "damn she's a great mom" or even "I always knew she'd be a great mother". But my kids are taught love and respect and humility and laughter. And that's the best thing I think I can do for them. They are growing up to be wonderful, amazing people and I couldn't be prouder of them.
While Ben is my little spitfire and so full of personality, Matthew is my soul. He is so much like me it's amazing. He's got the sensitive heart, the sense of humor and the need to be loved by everyone. He cries if you're mad at him and beams when you're proud. He's great in school. He loves reading and science and reading. His favorite subject by far is math. In kindergarten, when all the other kids were excited about the playground and playing in the sand, he just wanted to "use the calculators" He is unbelievably excited about playing the cello next year, loves that he's learning tennis this summer and loves to laugh. He's just so cool.
I used to be very good about keeping a journal and after Matthew's birth I wrote this entry:
God, I just can't believe that I have a baby. We just waited for this for what seems like forever. And it's here. He's here. It is the most amazing thing EVER. We picked Matthew because it means Gift From God, and let me tell you girls, there is no more a clear indication of there being a God than this little boy. Our miracle boy. And god, I love him so much already.
At the time I didn't think I could love another thing any more than I did that day, and yet here we are seven years later and my heart just bursts every time I look at him. He is my mini-me, which makes him so easy to love. He's really funny, smart, and so incredibly affectionate. He's growing up to be just as wonderful as I could have ever hoped.
While some days I wish for those baby days back again, I'm loving watching him grow in this amazing young man. I can only hope that he continues to be this wonderful for the rest of his life.
But wasn't it just yesterday that he was born? I swear it was.
How does time go by so fast? Happy Birthday young man